Published on: January 26, 2025
Last Edited: January 26, 2025
Last Article Reviewed: Letters to my Daughter: Myths and Tips to Strategically Distinguish Between Careers and Passions
As I looked at which articles to tackle next, I noticed more and more ideas that felt similar to the ones I had written in the past. So why not do my own analysis of what I have written so far? It might seem self-serving because, after all, the purpose of this blog is primarily writing for myself. This blog is a repository of living ideas and sometimes, doing a thorough review might uncover something new.
Creativity
A creative person is one, who enjoys, above all, the company of his own mind. Anything done well, from baking a souffle to putting together a winning stock portfolio is creative.
The trick to creativity, if there is a single useful thing to say about it, is to identify your own peculiar talent and then settle down to work with it for a good long time.
Everyone has an aptitude for something. The trick is to recognize it, to work with it… The problem is that the things you’re good at come naturally.
And since most people are modest instead of arrogant sobs, what comes naturally you don’t see as a special skill. It’s just you. It’s what you’ve always done.
Denise G. Shekerjian, Uncommon Genius
From Everyday Productivity Insights from Great Artists
Overfamiliariazation with something (an idea, metaphor, object) is a trap. Where creativity is concerned – that is the irony of the skill – the more adept you become at something, the less likely you are to appreciate a variation.
Denise G. Shekerjian, Uncommon Genius
From Shoshin, the Zen Concept that Applies to Companies, Science and Personal Development
See Also:
Cultural Insights and Phenomena
Shoshin
Shoshin is a concept from Zen Buddhism that translates to “beginner’s mind.” It refers to approaching experiences with an open, receptive, and curious mindset, free from preconceived notions and biases, even after achieving competence in a field. This doesn’t mean abandoning expertise but leveraging it while maintaining a fresh perspective.
In the beginner’s mind, there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s, there are few.
Zen master Shunryo Suzuki
Consider the Einstellung effect, which is the negative influence of prior experience on problem-solving. The Einstellung effect can make individuals fixated on familiar approaches, hindering their ability to consider new and potentially better solutions.
Or consider the Dunning-Kruger effect, a cognitive bias where individuals with low competence in a specific area overestimate their abilities, failing to recognize their limitations.
Shoshin in Business
- Customer-centric Innovation: Shoshin is crucial for continuous innovation, driven by understanding and addressing customer frustrations. As Jeff Bezos said, “Customers are always beautifully, wonderfully dissatisfied, even when they report being happy and business is great.”
- Overcoming Expert Bias: Experts can fall prey to the Einstellung effect, hindering their ability to solve new problems due to ingrained thought patterns. New hires with fresh perspectives can challenge established methods and stimulate innovation.
- Practical Framework for Cultivating Shoshin from the Curiosity Muscle book by Andy Fromm and Diana Kander:
- Identify blind spots and challenge assumptions.
- Focus on the right customer needs and emerging trends.
- Conduct small experiments to validate ideas and reduce risks.
- Engage diverse perspectives and expertise to solve problems.
Shoshin in Scientific Research
- Paradigm Shifts from Novices: Philosopher of science Thomas Kuhn observed that major scientific breakthroughs often come from young researchers or those new to a field, as they are less bound by existing paradigms.
- Plank’s Principle: “Science progresses one funeral at a time.” Nobel prize winner Max Planck believed that scientific innovation often occurs through generational change rather than the persuasion of established experts.
- Study on Impact of Star Scientists’ Deaths: Research revealed that indeed, the passing of leading scientists working in the life sciences leads to an influx of new researchers and publications in the field, suggesting that entrenched authority figures can sometimes hinder scientific progress.
“The conclusion of this paper is not those stars are bad,” says Pierre Azoulay, the study co-author. “It’s just that, once safely ensconced at the top of their fields, maybe they tend to overstay their welcome.”
Fostering Shoshin
- Actively Question Biases and Assumptions.
- Seek Feedback and Diverse Perspectives.
- Embrace New Experiences and Challenges.
- Cultivate Curiosity and a Love of Learning.
- Engage in Activities Outside of One’s Comfort Zone.
From Shoshin, the Zen Concept that Applies to Companies, Science and Personal Development
Financial Education
Building a Career: Passion, Skills, and Ikigai
Regarding career choices, there is a potentially harmful approach of “following your passion” because it might lead to a constant search for that special something, resulting in job-hopping and dissatisfaction.
There is a Romanian proverb, “pofta vine mâncând” or “appetite comes with eating”. This proverb captures the difference between “do what you love” and “love what you do.” What may seem like unattractive opportunities at first can bring passion to our lives if we become competent in those areas. And increased competence leads to increased autonomy.
Passion is Not Enough
Passions are dynamic and might not sustain the demands of a career.
There are days when you will feel highly passionate and enthusiastic. Can you maintain high levels of intense passion day after day? Week after week? Year after year? Probably not, as this process quickly becomes mentally draining and exhausting.
A More Holistic Approach, Ikigai
Ikigai is defined as the intersection of what you love, what you’re good at, what you can be paid for, and what the world needs. This encourages a broader perspective than just passion, encompassing purpose, impact, and financial viability.
Developing Rare and Valuable Skills
Instead of trying to be the best at one thing, we could try to become very good (top 25%) in rare or valuable skills (skills that are in demand and not easily replicated or automated).
An extremely efficient method to create rare and valuable skills is to combine two or more “rather good” skills until no one has your specialized skillset. Most probably, none of your skills, taken separately, is the best as it would be necessary for the first strategy, but this unique combination of breadth and depth will create a high-pay and high-demand package.
However, …
I’m sorry to say so
but, sadly, it’s true
that Bang-ups
and Hang-ups
can happen to you.
As Dr Seuss formidably put it, the brutal truth is that we will traverse periods of ebbs and flows more ebbs, poetically known as the Valley of Despair from the Dunning–Kruger Effect.
Not all endeavours you will pursue are due to have success, as most times, you will fail, discouraged and stuck in a pit of gloom. Know, dear daughter, that perhaps no matter how hard you try, you will never achieve mastery levels in a specific career path. It is yet another fact of life.
Ask yourself, as Dr Seuss said:
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?
Sometimes it is far better to turn around and drop the things that keep you small.
From Letters to my Daughter: Myths and Tips to Strategically Distinguish Between Careers and Passions
Build a Safety Net
Money does not bring happiness. Money buys freedom. Freedom to leave a job. Freedom to manage an economic recession. Freedom to take a leave when you feel burned out. Freedom to leave a country. Freedom to own a house. Freedom to leave an abusive relationship.
Having your own emergency fund should be your top priority. You are buying a part of your freedom with an emergency fund.
Do not stop until you have this financial safety net. If you need to thrift, work extra hours, decline going out invitations, so be it. It will not be forever.
Just because your income will be growing, that does not mean expenses should also be increasing. You will enjoy life much more vividly when you know you have strong roots.
Money is just another means to an end, pure and simple. Although, there is nothing pure nor simple when money is involved.
From Letters to my Daughter: Build Your “F*ck Off” Fund
Metaphorical Thinking
Introduction
Language is fossil poetry. As the limestone of the continent consists of infinite masses of the shells of animalcules, so language is made up of images, or tropes, which now, in their secondary use, have long ceased to remind us of their poetic origin.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Language is fossil poetry because metaphors are everywhere, hiding in plain sight.
You’re the apple of my eye.
Don’t leave me hanging.
I’m on the fence.
Let me dig into it.
Here is the scoop.
I have to sleep on it.
It was right under my nose.
They have a big mouth.
Metaphors are not just literary devices but fundamental tools we use to structure our worldview, understand abstract concepts, and even shape our social interactions and biases.
Drawing on the work of George Lakoff and Mark Johnson (Metaphors We Live By), consider these examples:
- Time as a Commodity: We often consider time something that can be saved, spent, wasted, or budgeted. This reflects our industrialized society, where time is often linked to payment and value.
- I spent twenty minutes looking for my keys, and then I wasted one hour in traffic.
- I am running out of time.
- How much time do you have left?
- I am living on borrowed time.
- And the most conclusive example of seeing time as a commodity, a limited and precious resource: Thank you for your time.
- Arguments as War: We commonly use military terms to describe arguments. This framing influences our experience of arguments, making it difficult to really listen to what the other person is saying as we might mentally prepare counterarguments.
- He attacked my point of view.
- I’ve never lost an argument with him.
- Do you disagree? Okay, shoot!
- I lost my ground.
Metaphors and Creativity
Metaphors can be used creatively to help us reframe and approach problems from different angles. New metaphors are described as being almost like we see the world afresh. Consider scientific breakthroughs achieved by thinking metaphorically:
- Charles Darwin’s tree metaphor for evolution.
- August Kekulé’s image of the snake biting its tail for the structure of benzene.
- Albert Einstein’s thought experiment of chasing a beam of light.
Metaphors and Social Mental Models
Metaphors shape how we understand complex social issues. Consider:
Our schools are, in a sense, factories, in which the raw products (children) are to be shaped and fashioned into products to meet the various demands of life. The specifications for manufacturing come from the demands of twentieth-century civilization, and it is the business of the school to build its pupils according to the specifications laid down.
- The Boiling Frog metaphor for climate change (though recognizing its scientific inaccuracy) serves as a cautionary tale for our inability to react to gradual threats.
In essence, metaphors are water. The container determines the metaphor’s shape. Try to understand something new through the lenses of a circle, and the new concept becomes a circle. As they are powerful, metaphors can also become ineffective if using the wrong container.
You don’t see something until you have the right metaphor to let you perceive it.
James Gleick – Chaos
See Also:
The Web Metaphors
If you asked people in 1989 what they needed to make their life better, it was unlikely that they would have said a decentralized network of information nodes that are linked using hypertext.
Metaphors are essential for bridging the gap between complex technical concepts and our everyday understanding.
The Ubiquity of Web Metaphors
Our digital interactions are heavily framed by metaphors, which help us understand them. Consider
- Websites: Described using “book” and “home” metaphors (e.g., “bookmark a webpage,” “go to the homepage“).
- Forums: Likened to “boards” (e.g., “post on a forum”).
- Applications: Described as “vehicles” (e.g., “run a program”).
- Navigation: “Breadcrumb navigation” is borrowed from the fairy tale Hansel and Gretel.
- Blogging: A metaphor for online logging (weblog).
Metaphors in Web Security
Metaphors are also used for digital security concepts:
- Firewalls: Analogous to literal walls that block viruses or pop-up ads.
- Paywalls: Represent restrictions on access to content, requiring purchases or subscriptions.
- Computer Viruses: Malicious software that infects a computer, replicating itself and spreading to other systems.
- Trojan Horse Virus: Software described using the metaphor of the ancient Greek story of the wooden horse used to infiltrate Troy, misleading users of its true intent.
Emojis and Icons as Metaphors
- Settings – ⚙️
- New – ➕
- Edit – ✏️
- Save – 💾
- Delete – 🗑️or ❌
- Notifications – 🔔
- Search – 🔍
- Comment – 💬
These visual metaphors are crucial for efficient communication in the digital space. However, these are not understood by everyone, with some seeing them as “modern hieroglyphs.”
From Metaphorical Thinking – the Web Metaphors
Parenting
The Four Styles of Parenting
Based on the research of Diana Baumrind, Eleanor Maccoby, and John Martin, there are four primary types of parenting styles:
Neglectful Parenting
- Characteristics: Low emotional support and low expectations; detached from a child’s life.
- Impact: Children may develop aggression, impulsivity, low self-esteem, and higher risks of substance abuse and depression.
Authoritarian Parenting
- Characteristics: Low emotional support but high expectations; strict and dictatorial.
- Impact: Children may become anxious, have low self-confidence, and exhibit rebellious behavior during adolescence.
Permissive Parenting
- Characteristics: High emotional support but low expectations; lenient and indulgent. Permissive parents often say, ‘Kids will be kids,’ avoiding consistent rules enforcement.
- Impact: Children may struggle with self-discipline, resilience, and problem-solving skills.
Authoritative Parenting
- Characteristics: High emotional support and high expectations; firm but fair.
- Impact: Children with authoritative parents tend to develop good self-esteem, motivation, resilience, and better mental health.
Parenting Consistency
- It seems that having at least one authoritative parent is more important than two non-authoritative parents.
- Some parents may adopt different styles based on a child’s gender or age, such as being authoritative with daughters and authoritarian with sons or varying styles between the first child and younger siblings. This variability can make it challenging to maintain a consistent approach.
- Fluctuating between authoritarian, authoritative, and permissive styles can lead to child rebellion and confusion.
From The Four Styles of Parenting
The National Bank of Parents: a Simple Financial Education Strategy for Children
Most of our strategy to teach our 8 year-old daughter how to manage her money responsibly is based on David Owen’s book, The First National Bank of Dad: The Best Way to Teach Kids About Money. Once a child can recognize numbers and make basic calculations, they are ready for their financial education.
The strategy involves giving our daughter a weekly allowance, no questions asked (for the time being, €5, paid from the monthly child benefit we receive in Ireland, €140), teaching her about spending versus saving, and avoiding payment for chores or grades.
However, we would pay our daughter for household jobs that are either seasonal or fall outside the category of ordinary jobs (e.g., helping with family projects, cleaning the car, mowing the grass, etc.).
Linking a chore to an allowance turns the chore into a job, which creates the possibility that the worker might decide someday to retire. ‘I decided to stop cleaning up after myself, so why don’t you keep the next 4-5 allowances for yourself?’
David Owen – The First National Bank of Dad
Children should have the freedom to make their own spending decisions, even if those decisions result in purchases that we might consider unwise.
Our daughter needs to learn to control her money, and if that involves buying stuff that will fall apart in two days… Well, then, it is her money, not mine, so she will be more careful and remember what happened last time.
We don’t do any mandatory savings and donations from our daughter’s money. One of the best ways is to teach children is by example. If we, the parents, or the caregivers, regularly donate money, items, or time, children will imitate us.
Some level of “irresponsible” spending is necessary for children to learn the difference between smart and foolish choices. To become responsible savers, we might need to first spend irresponsibly, with no credit cards involved, of course. We need these opportunities to make mindful and mindless decisions.
If our daughter wants to buy a toy or a decoration for her room, she does not have to convince me (“How can I talk mum into paying for this?”). She has to convince herself (“Do I really want it?”).
From The National Bank of Parents: a Simple Financial Education Strategy for Children
Wimmelbooks
Wimmelbooks are a distinctive type of picture book characterized by their large-format, wordless illustrations filled with intricate details. These books are primarily designed for young children and serve as an excellent tool for pre-literacy development. Wimmelbooks rely heavily on visuals to convey stories, allowing children to interpret the scenes independently.
These books showed us how a child progresses from building words to building worlds.
See Also:
Well-Being
Insleepia
You visited me again last night
And I woke up again in fright.
I didn’t know what else to do.
Should I have screamed? Should I have welcomed you?
You bring me gifts of smoke.
You’re in my head.
A rain of words,
A wind of plots,
A storm of thoughts.
You’re all the stories that I couldn’t write,
All the wounds that didn’t cease to bite,
All the shadows that never leave without a fight.
You bring me gifts of light.
You’re in my hand.
And when you cover the entire house
You let me see the unseen part of me.
The one who’s quiet as a mouse.
The one who feels at times denied.
The one who’d write all night
Until the ink of me runs white.
Hours fly, from one to four, until you say: Alright!
Did you set up your 6 am alarm? Good night, sleep tight!
Some of us will never have to battle insomnia. For the rest of us, who suffer(ed) through a continuous, debilitating lack of sleep, I salute you. Regarding my sleep, I am in a much better place now. Yet I know once I tasted insomnia, she is never too far.
From Insleepia
When Buddhism’s Nonattachment Overlaps Stoicism’s Dichotomy of Control
Stoicism’s dichotomy of control (what we can and cannot control) and Buddhism’s concept of non-attachment to outcomes are strikingly similar approaches to resilience.
At its core, the Stoic exercise of the dichotomy of control states that things are either up to us or not. We would gain more if we focused our time, attention and efforts on variables we can control. This concept doesn’t sound mind-boggling, and yet…
And yet, how much sorrow, pain, betrayal, hurt, disbelief we endure when we navigate the shallow, toxic waters of “if-only”:
If only I could have more money, I would be happy.
If only I got that job, I would be happy.
If only I could meet somebody special, I would be happy.
Perhaps you have heard about the Serenity Prayer:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.
It will not be a surprise that the Wikipedia page of the Serenity Prayer mentions Epictetus and Buddhist scholars as influences.
From When Buddhism’s Nonattachment Overlaps Stoicism’s Dichotomy of Control
Writing
The best moments in reading are when you come across something – a thought, a feeling, a way of looking at things – which you had thought special and particular to you. Now here it is, set down by someone else, a person you have never met, someone even who is long dead. And it is as if a hand has come out and taken yours.
Alan Bennett
A Home for Ideas
I have it in me
This idea that wants to break free.
The snow
Of the A4
Says: “Come, I’ll be your home.”
Black, tiny letters start running wild like a poem.
Until the dark
Of the ink
Says: “Stop, here comes the dot.”
From A Home for Ideas
Word Beings
And maybe a word is more than a thing.
It seems to laugh, it seems to cry.
It is all wonders and is all a lie.
And maybe we are beings drawn in words.
Choking on their meanings blurred.
A drop of poison in the sweet of honey.
Yeast fermenting in hope and money.
Knife that slays or barely sighs.
Bridges forming, crossing eyes.
And in the end, what is a word?
Playdough.
From Word Beings